Why did he/she have to die?
“She was really smart and had so many friends…” -
Andrew
“I
keep thinking about why he didn’t know how
much we all loved him.” - Sara
With all deaths, we ask “why” and for many, we have
answers from physicians, police officers or emergency responders. With
death by suicide, the search for answers never seems to be over.
It seems there is no answer.
As difficult as it may be to understand, taking his own life becomes
the only possible way the person can see out of the unbearable
pain of depression. Although he is loved by family and friends,
he cannot concentrate on anything but his own pain. His thinking
becomes constricted and narrow, like tunnel vision and he can see
no other solution. This judgment has nothing to do with reality,
but the person cannot see this.
It is hard to think about the happy memories when someone dies
especially when they die by suicide. Try not to think about
how your friend died, instead try to focus on how they lived – what
they liked to do, good times you had, what they cared about.