Needham Acts - Grieving Teens: I feel like no one understands.

I feel like no one understands.

“People try to help and say they know how I feel, but they don’t know" - Lauren

“I hate it when people tell me it’s time to move on” - Matt

“How can things just go on like normal? How can I go to class, do my homework, go to practice? All these things seem so unimportant. When I was told I had to go to practice, I thought, don’t they know?” - Jenn

Knowing what to do or say when a person is grieving is very hard. It is hard for adults and may be even harder for teens. Well-meaning people may say things like “you’re young; you’ll get over,” “time heals all wounds,” or “she would not want you to be so sad.” These words are offered because people don’t know what to say and they want to help. Routine can be comforting to some people when they have had a terrible loss; it provides a safe, predictable environment during a chaotic time. For others, it seems cruel that life can still go on without the loved one.

Everyone copes with a loss in their own way. There is no right or wrong way to feel when you experience the death of someone you care about. Acknowledging the sadness and pain is a first step in healing. Be good to yourself and know you are not alone. This may feel like a lonely time and that others don’t understand. It is difficult; you may not even understand what you are feeling yourself. If it is too hard to handle on your own, you can always reach out to someone.